No judgment here
Last night I dreamed of snakes. Two of them. One green and one yellow. They had names I can't remember and little antennae things like slugs. I was hauling them with me to school for some reason when they escaped. It was awful. I was looking for them all over my classroom, trying to calm the panic rising in my throat. Then, for no apparent reason at all, the snakes morphed into frogs--still on the loose. It was during the frantic frog-chasing sequence of my dream when I felt something poking my rear end and trying to crawl up my crack. Lovely, right? I looked over my shoulder and it was one of the frogs, that at this point had once again become a snake. Just as I went to jump and scream, I awoke in my own bed...to a three-year old little girl carefully trying to adjust my underwear to better cover my bum while I slept. Apparently, my backside was out of the sheets and practically in full view when she came into my room upon waking up this morning.
That is a prime example of a moment I hope Anna doesn't remember when she's 10...or 30. As much as I love my own mother, I am thankful I don't have memories of picking her chewies (or anyone else's, for that matter).
It's interesting, though, to watch Anna watch me. That wild-headed little beauty hasn't yet reached the age of inhibition, so she says what she thinks, acts on impulse, and loves with reckless abandon (when she sees fit, of course). Her transparency is, perhaps, what fascinates me most. At nearly 30, I have grown quite accustomed to people reacting to my appearance. Anna just doesn't seem to care what I look like. To her, I'm "Mom" whether I'm dressed up and dolled up or looking as though I crawled out from the bottom of a dumpster. She doesn't pay attention to stretch marks or muscle tone, and any dress I wear regardless of fit or color instantly makes me like Cinderella. She passes no judgment, and it's incredibly refreshing.
So while I'm not delighted that she lacks the understanding of personal boundaries to the extent she'll squeeze the "extra" on my belly for fun and take it upon herself to adjust my underpants, I am delighted that she is still so innocent and so willing to take me for all I am.
Oh, Anna. I hope she keeps at least some of that precious ability to see the world through such an objective lens and love all the people in it. And I hope she can see herself through the same lens. She's Anna, she's wonderful, and I wouldn't change a thing!
That is a prime example of a moment I hope Anna doesn't remember when she's 10...or 30. As much as I love my own mother, I am thankful I don't have memories of picking her chewies (or anyone else's, for that matter).
It's interesting, though, to watch Anna watch me. That wild-headed little beauty hasn't yet reached the age of inhibition, so she says what she thinks, acts on impulse, and loves with reckless abandon (when she sees fit, of course). Her transparency is, perhaps, what fascinates me most. At nearly 30, I have grown quite accustomed to people reacting to my appearance. Anna just doesn't seem to care what I look like. To her, I'm "Mom" whether I'm dressed up and dolled up or looking as though I crawled out from the bottom of a dumpster. She doesn't pay attention to stretch marks or muscle tone, and any dress I wear regardless of fit or color instantly makes me like Cinderella. She passes no judgment, and it's incredibly refreshing.
So while I'm not delighted that she lacks the understanding of personal boundaries to the extent she'll squeeze the "extra" on my belly for fun and take it upon herself to adjust my underpants, I am delighted that she is still so innocent and so willing to take me for all I am.
Oh, Anna. I hope she keeps at least some of that precious ability to see the world through such an objective lens and love all the people in it. And I hope she can see herself through the same lens. She's Anna, she's wonderful, and I wouldn't change a thing!
horay for a blog from lacey land! anna sounds wonderful, although i would have expected nothing else. i hope all is well with the "new" house and otherwise - have a nice summer!
ReplyDelete(michelle)